Sick

Shel Silverstein

Sick

"I cannot go to school today,"
Said little Peggy Ann McKay.
"I have the measles and the mumps,
A gash, a rash and purple bumps.
My mouth is wet, my throat is dry,
I'm going blind in my right eye.
My tonsils are as big as rocks,
I've counted sixteen chicken pox
And there's one more--that's seventeen,
And don't you think my face looks green?
My leg is cut--my eyes are blue--
It might be instamatic flu.
I cough and sneeze and gasp and choke,
I'm sure that my left leg is broke--
My hip hurts when I move my chin,
My belly button's caving in,
My back is wrenched, my ankle's sprained,
My 'pendix pains each time it rains.
My nose is cold, my toes are numb.
I have a sliver in my thumb.
My neck is stiff, my voice is weak,
I hardly whisper when I speak.
My tongue is filling up my mouth,
I think my hair is falling out.
My elbow's bent, my spine ain't straight,
My temperature is one-o-eight.
My brain is shrunk, I cannot hear,
There is a hole inside my ear.
I have a hangnail, and my heart is--what?
What's that? What's that you say?
You say today is. . .Saturday?
G'bye, I'm going out to play!"

Today I feel like this poem minus the Saturday part. I've run fever since Sunday night and my head is set to explode any minute.

Last night, as I was trying to sleep in our recliner, this poem popped into my head. My mom read Shel's wonderful, silly poems to us when we were little and although I hadn't thought of this poem in years, last night it came back to me. Maybe in my misery I just missed and wanted my mom OR maybe I actually know that I'm pretty sure that I might have ALL of those symptoms. Have you guessed that I'm not a good patient? I don't do sickness well or with grace even though I try to be good.

We (the household here in Texas) are VERY ready to be well. One or all of us has been sick since the beginning of December. We went through 9 boxes of tissues in two weeks. That's an average of 3 boxes a piece. Note to self: Buy stock in Kleenex. We grateful accept the "Outstanding Nose Blowing Household" award from the Kleenex brand company. It will have a place of honor on our mantel...right beside the big, enormous box of Kleenex.

Thank you for commiserating with me. And if you've made it through this miserable post this far, as a bonus here's a little bit of Shel Silverstein trivia for you.

Did you know that Shel Silverstein wrote the music and lyrics for "A Boy Named Sue" which was performed by Johnny Cash and for which Silverstein won a Grammy in 1970?